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Love now and always.
Did you fall in love last night?
Just tell her I love her.
Love is stronger than anything.
For the love.
Love.
And I love you more than anything.
What is love?
Here’s to love.
Love.
I was super happy to be here.
Yeah, absolutely.
Absolutely.
No. No. I was not very cool.
It was interesting, because at that point, it became very clear our differences in a great way.
I really appreciated it.
I was still very nerdy.
I’m in medical school, and I’m studying all the time and trying to do the right thing and show up on time.
And he’s in art school, and he’s very cool, even cooler.
I think the disparity of coolness is getting bigger.
Once he finishes art school, he starts working for a gallery.
And my then boyfriend Hans at the time and I would go to these events and feel very not hip, but maybe a little hip-adjacent.
We joked that he would stay up late because he would do art into the wee hours, and I would stay up late because I was learning, I was cramming for an exam.
And I would feed him.
That’s, again, this is the big sister.
So I would make meals and invite Tim and his girlfriend to come over and eat meals with us.
Explaining things helps.
Jamie Shandro, welcome to “Modern Love.”
Thanks, Anna.
I’m super happy to be here.
Absolutely.
No.
I do love these notebooks full of lyrics that he makes.
I think they feel like spoken word poetry or beat poetry in some way.
And they reflect his inner life and his outer life a little bit.
And they don’t make sense in some ways.
And they make lots of sense in other ways.
Yeah, I could share some lyrics.
Yeah, let me read some.
I need space, like all of it, outer even.
Red, shimmering, daylight, bouncing, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.
What’s that say with words?
Together, my maybe style.
Maybe it’s feel free, her life.
X yellow battles become barely yellow.
Who knows, really? But I need space, like all of it, outer even? Me too.
It is.
I think that’s the part, too, is that he is funny.
He’s really creative.
And he’s really funny.
And —
Exactly.
Me too.
It was an honor to be here, Anna.
Thank you.
Before we go, Jamie asked Tim if he’d be willing to share some music with us, and he said yes.
So here’s a part of “One Snow Leopard Chance” by Tim Shandro.
[Audio clip]
If you want to read Jamie Shandro’s “Modern Love” essay, we’ll have the link in our show notes.
This episode of “Modern Love” was produced by Amy Pearl with help from Davis Land.
It was edited by Gianna Palmer and Jen Poyant, production management by Kristina Joseph.
The “Modern Love” theme music is by Dan Powell, original music by Dan Powell, Marion Lozano, Roman Niemisto, and Sonia Herrero.
We also feature original music by Tim Shandro.
This episode was mixed by Daniel Ramirez with studio support from Maddie Masiello and Nick Pittman.
Special Thanks to Mahima Chablani, Nell Gallogly, Jeffrey Miranda, and Paula Schumann.
The “Modern Love” column is edited by Daniel Jones.
Miya Lee is the editor of “Modern Love” projects.
If you want to submit an essay or a tiny love story to “The New York Times,” we have the instructions in our show notes.
I’m Anna Martin.
Thanks for listening.
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